CONSERVATISM RIDES THE PALE HORSE

THE PALE HORSE. BY MATTHEW LUCAS BECKETT. Uninsurable Gunshot Gay was on her way to meet a girl. She couldn't remember her name, but her brother had assured her that this time this blind date really was interested in dating “In Gender” as Thomas had put it. There was an unusually strong spring in her step. “In spite of the fact that I've known who and what I am since I was eleven years old,” she mused. “I've never had a first date with a girl that warranted a second, and dates with boys are boring.” She rubbed the bald patch on her head self-consciously. “Some people can not see past the place where the bullet went in or the damage it did to my brain, of course,” she went on. “But more often it's me who does not call back for a second date.” Then she turned a corner and the smell of fresh pastries wafted up her large nostrils. She walked into Ernie's Bakery, looking around but trying not to be too obvious about it. A Drop Dead and Be Buried Gorgeous Girl in the far corner of the small room noticed her and waved a surreptitious hand. Uninsurable approached at a pace that was quick but not so quick as to draw attention. “Uninsurable?” the girl asked quietly, her eyes darting all around. Uninasurable assured herself that all of the other customers were occupied in their own conversations, then nodded and sat down. “My brother told me, but I've been terrible with names since I got shot in the head at three.” “Christy,” the girl said in a whisper. “But now that we've rondevued here ,let's go somewhere more private to talk.” Uninsurable nodded. “There's an underground Gay Bar a block away. No one knows it's not just some bar but the regulars like Thomas and I.” Christy still looked very nervous, but nodded, so they each bought a roll and then left, five minutes apart, at Christy's insistence When they reached The Silver Fork, they saw all sorts through the window, and some of the tension finally left Christy's face. Entering, as expected, Uninsurable saw that everyone inside was indeed paired with someone of the same sex. “They paint the windows and put in manicans that don't look Gay so that we don't get any unwanted attention,” Uninsurable told a confused looking Christy. “Let's find a seat.” They sat down and their waiter, who also happened to be Thomas's Boy-Friend, had just come over to take their order, when the doors burst open. In rode a figure cloaked and hooded in black and astride a pale horse. “There are no horses in. . .” the manager, Frank started to shout. Instantly the head turned towards him, and the moment he saw what was under the hood, he fell silent and a moment later fell lifeless to the floor. Everyone screamed and ran, but Uninsurable and Christy were not fast enough. Before they made it to the door, the figure pulled out an assault rifle and shot them both in the chest. Then the figure turned to ride away, but as he did they saw the face. “Was that The Speaker of The House or The Gun Nuts Organization Head?” asked Uninsurable, stunned “I'm not sure,” said Christy. “But he also looked a lot like that Pastor that's been railing against Gays and Gay Rights so. Call 911 on your cellular phone, we're both bleeding a lot.” The ambulance took its time, in Uninsurable's opinion, but eventually got there and rushed them to The nearest Emergency Room. Once there, Christy was rushed right in, but when The E.M.T.S started to remove Uninsurable from the ambulance, the pale horse reappeared, only this time its rider wore a doctors coat. “No uninsured patients in this E.R.” he said. “But Sir,” they said. “This is an Emergency Room, and this girl is in an emergency situation.” “Nevertheless,” said The Doctor that now looked like The Speaker of The House astride the pale horse. “Someone with her health history and thus no Health Insurance will not be treated here.” Then Uninsurable saw through all the facades as her heart and breathing slowed. The figure on the pale horse gave a horrible laugh, and then Uninsurable Gunshot Gay let out a last, desperate breath and could not draw another one. “Mommy, Daddy,” she screamed inside her head, and then all went black.