THE RIGHT TO BEAR BRAINS SHALL NOT BE INFRINGED

THE RIGHT TO BARE BRAINS SHALL NOT BE INFRINGED BY MATTHEW LUCAS BECKETT The mood was contentious and extremely tense as the vote began. At first, sensible Democrats were hopeful. “Surely, just requiring people purchasing a gun at a Gun Show to go through the same background checks as a gun store purchaser is something everyone could agree to. The only people that would adversely effect are criminals and the mentally unstable, whom everyone agrees should not have guns.” But, as the votes began to come in from The Republican side of the isle, it became clear the The Nutty Rebellious Anarchists Official Campaign of LIES, DECEPTION AND FACT MANIPULATION had had an effect. Several referred to the rumored registry as they cast their neigh votes, even though the text of the actual bill specifically banned such a registry, as several Sensible Democrats had tried to get through their Republican Colleagues solid granite skulls. Eventually, when it became clear that the Republican filibuster could not be broken, the Democratic Majority Leader called for an end to the voting, knowing that if it went all the way, the bill could not be brought up again, while this way it could. “So, to the mentally ill and those with criminal histories, we say, just go to the gun shows and you can get whatever you want,” the majority whip muttered under her breath as they all filed out of The Senate Chamber. “We did it,” Senator Rob Armory raved like the lunatic that he is on TV. that night. “We stopped the government from taking away every Americans' God Given Second Amendment Right to own any gun or guns they want.” People who had lost loved ones to gun violence turned their TVs off after that. A few days later, at the Phoenix Gun Show, a man with a wild look in his eyes walked up to a dealer. “Hello, I need to buy a gun,” he said. “What kind of gun would you like?” the dealer asked, looking not the least bit concerned at the man's mad looking eyes. “Something powerful,” said the man. “I just got out of Prison, and there are government agents and aliens trying to get into my home and read my mind twenty-four-seven.” “How about an M16 with an expanded clip,” the dealer offered. “That would be great,” the man said, looking wildly around. “And hurry, they're coming to get me right now.” He opened his wallet and pulled out three one-hundred dollar bills. The dealer took the money. “What were you in prison for?” he asked conversationally. “Murder and armed robbery,” the man answered without skipping a beat. “Did you do it?” the dealer asked, taking the requested gun out of its glass case. “Yes,” the man replied. “OK, here you go MR...?” “I'd rather not say, as I am number one on The F.B.I.'s, C.I.A.s and Interpol's most wanted lists,” the man replied, looking nervous. “Very well, here you go, Sir,” said the dealer,handing him the requested gun. The man took it and then ran from the show room without further comment. The next day at The Capital, Rob Armory and others were still basking in their recent victory. “I love seeing Democrats cry,” he said. “'Oh, those poor children, and if. . .'” he did a mock sniff. “'If he'd had to go through a back ground check..oh, no,, wait, it was his mother's gun. Still, if there were background checks at gun shows, we could prevent,oh, woe is us, some tragedies.' When all they really want is to control every aspect of our lives.” He heard a click and looked up to see the man, pointing his new gun straight at him. “You've been screwing my wife,” the man said. “That's why she left me. And you're the one whose been sending government and alien probes into my home and even into my mind. Prepare to die.” Without another word and before anyone could act, the man emptied a whole cartridge into Senator Rob Armory's head, and when Emergency personnel arrived, wrestled the man to the ground and took him away, there was no point in even calling an ambulance.

DEATH AND SEX

THOUGH DEATH DID US PART BY MATTHEW LUCAS BECKETT “And with that signature by President Trunkle, The Marriage Equality Act becomes the law of the land. Conservatives riot in. . .” My sister turns the TV. off before I throw my drink at it. I quickly set it down, then leap to my feet. “THEY RIOT!” I thunder. “I'll give you a riot. Four days. If this had happened four days ago, Matt and I could have gotten married here, and he wouldn't have been on that road to Canada to get us a situation there. He wouldn't have been in that accident, and he wouldn't be. . ..wouldn't be. . .” I could not bring myself to say the word. I still could not accept that my boy-friend of five years, since our Senior Year of High school, was gone. “Thomas, calm down,” said Ophilia. “I will not calm down,” I shouted. “If this had happened in time, I'd now be planning a Wedding with Matt, not preparing to attend his Funeral tomorrow. And then we could have at last made love. I'm sorry to say it in front of you, Sis, but I've got to say it sometime. We were saving ourselves for that, and now he's gone, and if this had happened earlier it could have, would have in fact, all been all right.” I had finally shouted myself into silence, and no one else seemed to have anything to say. So we watched the rest of The News in silence and then went to bed, knowing that tomorrow would be hard enough even on a full night's sleep, and not wanting to make it any harder with being tired. But at 1:37A.m.,, the exact time of the accident, I sat bolt upright, looking around wildly. I had heard something. I knew I had. What I had heard was impossible, but I was sure of it. I had heard Matt's voice. In the darkness, I heard it again, clearer this time. Come to me, Tommy Boy, just this one time. I froze. He'd only ever called me Tommy Boy when we were alone in his car or somewhere else where no one else could hear it, and I'd never shared this with anyone, not even my twin brother. Come, Tommy Boy, while there is still time. Before I'm sealed away forever. I made up my mind in an instant. I got up on cat's feet, walked over to my drawer, and removed the two golden bands that I had hidden there. Soft and quiet as a mouse, I tread down the stairs and into the garage, opened the garage door manually, put the car in neutral and pushed it quietly out, then closed the garage door, got in the driver's seat and put the car in gear. To my relief, no lights came on inside the house. Taking the least encumbered route I knew, I drove to The Funeral Home, parked, got out and knocked at the door. “I'm Matt Aramiss's boy-friend,” I explained. “I wanted to see the body one last time before tomorrow.” To my surprise, the woman nodded. “Of course,” she said. “I understand. Come right in.” She opened the door,let me in and escorted me to the body. “I'll leave you alone with him for the night,” she said. “Just be gone by sunrise.” I said I would, and she returned to the front desk. I sat awkwardly beside the corpse for a few moments. “Well, Matt,” I finally say awkwardly. “This isn't exactly the situation that I had envisioned for this, but here goes.” I get down on one knee beside the slab. “Matthew Mortimer Aromos, I've wanted to ask this for a long time. Will you merry me?” A breeze ruffles his head and it makes a slight forward motion. “I'll take that as a yes,,” then I slip the engagement ring onto his cold finger. “Do you Matthew Mortimer Arimos take me Thomas Samuel Davison to be your wedded husband, to have and to hold, to love and to cherish, in sickness and in health, for better or worse, for richer or poorer, and forsaking all others, keep yourself only for me, until death do us part. Burial, let's say, under these circumstances.” Another breeze generates another nod, and I place the Wedding Band on his finger, since this particular ceremony is by necessity a bit rushed. “Do I Thomas Samuel Davison, take thee Matthew Mortimer Artimos to be my wedded husband, to have and to hold, to love and to cherish, in sickness and in health, for better or worse, for richer or poorer, and forsaking all others, keep myself only for thee, until burial do us part. Yes, with all my heart. I wish...” I cannot get the words out. So I continue. “Then I declare us Man and Husband. We may now kiss.” I press my warm, living lips against his cold,dead lips, harder than I ever had in life, and hold them there until I must draw breath. Then I look to make sure we are alone, and check the windows to be sure sunrise is not imminent. Then I pull down my pants, climb on top of him, pry his mouth open, and stick my already erect penis into it. One squeeze is all it takes, and I am ejaculating like I have never ejaculated before. I kiss and caress his corpse while I penetrate him, and even for a while after my semen is spent. Then I get off of him, cry for a good long while as I pull my pants up and remove the rings, then leave and derive home, knowing now like I had not before that tomorrow really is good-bye, at least in this life.